week 2::journal 1

Today I taught my lesson. The things I were nervous about went relatively smoothly. I have to say, sixth hour, I absolutely loved teaching. I felt like they listened to me and respected me. I felt like I could tell someone to be quiet or get back on task and they responded to me as if I was really their teacher. Not only did they verbally respond to me, but their short-stories really came together. They all diligently wrote and were visibly getting excited about it. Seventh hour, however, didn't go quite as well. I felt like I was talking to myself during discussion and no one felt like responding. The assignment felt like an obligation to them. 

After looking at some of the papers already turned in, I was pretty disappointed. Alec's is maybe two paragraphs. When I asked him to keep going and try to really invest in it, he got disrespectful and continued playing an online game. I continually asked him to get off and for the first many times, he refused. Finally, with two minutes of class left, he got off. That was frustrating to me. I read his paper and it wasn't the assignment at all. 

I have decided to try and treat the two teaching periods as my two lessons. I didn't realize how much my learning objectives would change between lessons. I thought I was teaching the text but I turned out teaching the text with the purpose of the writing assignment. If I would have had a little more time to think about it, I would have altered my introduction of the assignment. Knowing how my objectives changed, I should have elaborated more about the story writing itself. It will be interesting to see what the students come up with and how closely it aligns with my intentions. 

I was surprisingly more comfortable in front of the class than I thought I would be. I also found great ease in circulating around the room to help out. I think I need to work on wait time though. I was so concerned that everyone hated the story and didn't know what to say about it so I wanted to fill the awkward silence.  

For the next lesson, I will probably try to match my actual lesson better to my objectives. I could also work a little better on my presence, especially for the second class. I need to figure out a way to get some of the kids to care more about it. 

week 1::journal 2

Today we facilitated a Socratic Seminar with Catcher in the Rye. I was disappointed in myself. I just didn't lead as much as I wanted to. I think I have a few ideas as to why that might be...

I had never really read the book. I mean, I have read it, but on my own over a summer when my brain wasn't in the mood to digest. (Boy...I missed out.) Therefore, I felt uncomfortable asking questions or offering responses. I thought I would have been better at kind of faking it, but apparently not.

I had never done a Socratic Seminar. I didn't really know what my role was as question-asker or responder. I thought of some really cool things to say but I had to remind myself that this discussion wasn't for me to participate in...it was for them. I knew this stuff now and I could draw these conclusions. The trouble was that I just wanted to tell them my newfound insights but that was totally off from the purpose of the exercise. Also, I just really loved the opportunity to observe.

I constantly wanted to change the subject or ask a new question because I felt like they were getting really off-track from what we intended for them to pick up on. P-A-T-I-E-N-C-E is a virtue. I noticed that you didn't quickly jump in and intervene; you allowed the discussion to continue to develop. Eventually they circled back around and even picked up some new insights i had never thought of before. This is a good lesson for me. Just when I thought they might not be quite capable enough to get at the big idea or whatever, the say something completely intriguing while arriving with perfect timing to that big idea. They are smart. And my purpose isn't just to relay information for them to regurgitate to me later on, it is to get them to think critically about literature and the world around them. I was so proud of them by the end.

I could obviously have done some things differently. And I could probably go on. But I wanted to take a moment to comment on some neat things I noticed during the discussion. Most everyone was engaged. In my classroom assessment class, my teacher says that discussion is great, but too many kids are too nervous. These kids are typically the second language learners or the kids with disabilities. Funny, I have consistently found the opposite to be true (maybe it is the room arrangement...) The kids that didn't speak up mostly weren't paying attention by choice. Wendell had something to say when his attention was refocused back to the group. And Nik consistently spoke up. I don't know that I have ever been in a class where everyone is so consistently engaged with the conversation. Also, just because a student is looking down or around the room doesn't mean he or she isn't listening and thinking hard about the comments being said. I was often surprised at the times some kids spoke up when I was convinced their minds were elsewhere. I think when it comes to classroom management, that is important to keep in mind. Overall, I am just really thankful for this exercise. I feel as if I have learned so much more than just the process of a Socratic Seminar (though that alone would have left me feeling blessed.)

week 1::journal 1

Today I heavily participated in lit circles! Thank you for that opportunity...I loved it. I felt like I was really able to get to know some of the kids (who remind me of sophomore sister). Over three class periods and a handful of groups, I noticed some pretty consistent things:

They all seem to like Catcher in the Rye. If they are focused and something strikes a chord with them, they certainly engage with the discussion.

If the teacher (you or me even) shows interest in their thoughts, they go even deeper. It is as if they want to but need a guide.

They get off task way too easily...then again, shouldn't that be expected of sophomores? :) I think they way you handle this is really effective. With their lit circles, it doesn't have to be all Holden all the time. In my group, I think they appreciated the fact that I wanted to hear about more than just their musings on the book. (Some super-duper kids, they are.) Still though, even in large class, their attention is so easily stolen by something else. I think the best answer to this is to know who it is, exactly, that you are teaching. That means that you must pick your battles. I think when it comes to demanding respect, you can't really do that if you are constantly begging the students to give you their attention. They won't respect a teacher who only ever scolds them. I like how you express your disappointment in their wandering minds (and mouths) but also move on. 

Something I found myself thinking about today had a lot to do with the dynamics of the relationships between the students. I love how they are open with you and eager to share their lives with you, but it is funny to watch them with each other. I have very little tolerance for bullies. Some of the kids get bullied. As a teacher, how do you deal with that? Especially when it is among boys (well, at least for today anyway). I know in my high school, it wasn't really cool for a big guy to be stood up for by his small, female teacher. Also, is there a way to treat the source of the negative treatment of some students rather than just the symptoms? An age old question that I might just have to keep thinking about...

Also, they love making connections to their own lives. This was so cool to see today because this is why I want to do this. People write about other people. And literature reveals things about ourselves. Not only that, but our lives create a context for the literature. My sixth-hour lit circle really dived into this idea. They thought of Holden as a peer. If he truly was a classmate, they would hate him. But for some reason, they really like him as a character in the book. We tried to figure out why...it was the revelation of his thought life. With the book, they had a new perspective of this stand-offish peer. We kind of arrived at a Atticus Finch place: you never know a person until you take a walk in his skin...or shoes...I can't remember which. 

In summary: being a truly effective, enjoyable teacher constitutes asking the right questions to guide their own critical thinking, listening when you need to listen, being conscious of the relationships they have with each other, and picking texts that they might be able to relate to in one way or another.